i really want to write about my college experience thus far

but it's too hot for that.

darn you rubin dorm and your no air-conditioning. i can't sit by the computer for more than 10 minutes at a time. and that's about the same for my sleeping pattern. my body just can't stay asleep drenched in sweat for so long.

boooooooooo heat.

lols i had this xanga entry open on my screen for the past 3 days. it was blank because i couldn't bring myself to sit and type.

AND DIE. teehee

tomorrow

i'm going to miss jackie

i'm going to miss my mommy

i'm going to miss my daddy

:(

but alas,

it's time to turn over a new leaf.
time to redesign an image of who i really am, and how i've changed inside these past few years,
to let that emerge from the oppressive, outdated shell that has reigned for far too long.

it's time to take a breath of fresh air.
go ahead, fill up those lungs.

goodbye, delaware. and good riddance. tomorrow will be our official farwell.
that means everything you have come to embody will be severed.
that's right, don't even think about it when i come back for holidays. ;)
because with God, i can overcome.

with God, i can finally grow to be the person He wants me to be, and thus, the person i want to be.

so with that,
NEW YORKKKKKKKKK.

teach me to walk faster.

yey

i'm happy because i won ROHTO's "win it wednesdays" and recieved a sample of their eye drops in the mail.

lawl.

they make my eyes feel minty. :D

edit: i discovered that this brand is popular among potheads. [via urbandictionary haha]
mouthwash for your eyeballs, huh?
iiiiinteresting.

REMEMBRALL FOR JENNILY

i have this tendency to finish things halfway and forget about them.

does that mean it was a half-hearted effort to begin with?
i'm a lazy person. it's quite possible.
how shameless.

i really don't understand how i manage to keep up a facade of an "overachiever-hermione-granger-awesome-possum-student" without even trying. or even the attempt to try. >_> it's a plus, i guess.
and it's something to strive for, i guess.

"i'm" my own role model. sad.

1. http://superfuturescholarship.org/
the first step is done; to enter into the random drawing, i simply need to create a profile.
okay, cools.
but they do give you the option to contribute to the site via blogging/forum/picture uploads/twitter-esque updates
100 entries put into the drawing by random, 100 others handpicked by the judging panel.

mathematically speaking, putting in effort and being picked by preference may yield higher chances than through simple random sample.

N0TE T0 SELF copy paste collegeapp essay into a blog + a freshly written ramble of how you want to save the world (but really just find yourself wearing your underwear over your pants).

IMP0RTANCE high (aug 15)

2. Gen and Kelly Tanabe Scholarship
i just recently entered into their fall 2010 contest. needless to say, it was a rushed and highly pathetic piece of 250 word writing.
i shall do better next timeeeeeee. and hopefully understand better what it is i want to do, exactly...

N0TE T0 SELF don't forget this one when the deadline rolls around

IMP0RTANCE low (dec 31)

3. http://www.afsascholarship.org/
a fire sprinkler scholarship....sounds fantastic!
but anyway, they make you read and take a test. multiple choice and open note, though - should be okay if it's about fire sprinklers...right?
psh...just listen to me talk myself up above fire sprinklers...when i know nothing about them.

N0TE T0 SELF actually set a time and sit down and just dooooo it. bring out the highlighters and critical reading skillz

IMP0RTANCE high (aug 25)

4. study statistics
i got a 5 on the AP, so that makes me qualified to take the placement exam during orientation. but i forgot everythinggggg (typical).
i've already registered and found a study guide/sample questions. the questions look familiar enough - although from what current stern students and alumni have said, it's meant for phD's or something. 55% is the highest grade i've seen so far from the testimonials i've come across. lol.

and i've procrastinated so much. bad jenny.

N0TE T0 SELF for goodness sakes - just finish reviewing the AP review book already. do the nyu study guide. do the practice AP exams. and review the stats exercise book. noooowwwwww.
also find the time and locations for the test.

IMP0RTANCE high (aug 29 - sept 3)

5. study chinese
i have one more lesson left in the chinese exercise book that i've been studying by. today i just finished the super-long section titled "hometown" and all these super hard vocabulary words that are tough to memorize since they're never part of my spoken vocabulary. XD but after that's done, i asked my mom if i could start reading the chinese translation of harry potter...ha li bo tuo, i think? it'll def be a huge challenge and i hope i don't burn out halfway.
also, i need to figure out whether i need to register for a language placement exam.
i shall call the eastern asian studies office whenever i get the chance.

N0TE T0 SELF call asap...no putting it off.

IMP0RTANCE med-high (sept 5)

6. piano
the chopin andante spianato and grande polonaise brillante is amazing...but it's also close to 30 pages long. i'm having a tough time setting enough time to learn it all...but when i do, i go at it forever and my mom yells at me about wasting time. XP i'm probably not going to finish learning it before i set off to college - but i aim to learn most of it.

N0TE T0 SELF learn a page a day

IMP0RTANCE med (this tuesday)

*i think there's a lot of harry potter references in this because i FINALLY managed to convince my sister that the potter series is fantastic. and since she's lighting-reading through them right now, i can't help but find myself flipping through a few pages at nostalgia's bidding.
* wowee i better start making some progress after typing all this. i'm so counterproductive in everything i do. i hope nobody i interact with in the business field ever finds that out.
* oh and these scholarships are pretty cool, i encourage anybody struggling with finances to check dem owwt.
* i'm a hardcore complainer. all in good taste.

old self, new self

"I won't tell you how I became a -- a dragon till i can tell the others and get it all over...I want to tell you how I stopped being one.

...

"Well, anyway, I looked up and saw the very last thing I expected: a huge lion coming slowly toward me. And one queer thing was that there was no moon last night, but there was moonlight where the lion was. So it came nearer and nearer. I was terribly afraid of it. You may think that, being a dragon, I could have knocked any lion out easily enough. But it wasn't that kind of fear."

...

"In the middle of it there was a well...The water was as clear as anything and I thought if I could get in there and bathe it would ease the pain in my leg. But the lion told me I must undress first...I was just going to say that I couldn't undress because I hadn't any clotheson when I suddenly thought that dragons are snaky sort of things and snakes can cast their skins. Oh, of course, thought I, that's what the lion means. So I started scratching myself and my scales began coming off all over the place. And then I scrathced a little deeper and, instead of just scales coming off here and there, my whole skin started peeling off beautifully, like it does after an illness, or as if I was a banana. In a minute or two I just stepped out of it. I could see it lying there beside me, looking rather nasty. I was a most lovely feeling. So I started to go down into the well for a bathe.

But just as I was going to put my feet into the water I looked down and saw that they were all hard and rough and wrinkled and scaly just as they had been before..."

...

"Then the lion said 'You will have to let me undress you...'

The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right into my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I've ever felt. The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off."

...

"And there was I as smooth and soft as a peeled switch and smaller than I had been."

...

"I think you've seen Aslan," said Edmund